Remind me ...

...NEVER to go swimming when it is mothers and babies morning.

Small pool at a hotel (I love the pool, it's underground and quirky), I love swimming very much (and am very grateful that my health has picked up enough for me to be going three times a week at the moment, heaven) but I do NOT love mothers and babies.

Not when I am trying to swim ... it's meant to destress me! But with 8 mums and assorted offspring, and a rather irritating teacher, all doing versions on a theme of 'and WOOOOOSH we go! oh LOOK at you Frederick, aren't you CLEVER!' (Not really. You threw him in. He cried), and 'let's all go SURFING (please God no, make it stop), are we READY? and SURF!' (all sing theme to Hawaii Five OHMYGODMAKEITSTOP!) keep swimming, up and down, up and down, don't look, pretend it's not happening and 'LET'S ALL GO WOOOOOOSH! up in the air!'

I did 20 lengths and gave up - then realised too late. Big error.
Yes, I got out at the same time as the class was ending and another was about to begin - stampede for the showers, then the entire changing room area looked like a creche.

Reminded me too much of taking a class of infants swimming when I used to work in primary schools ... was half expecting one to come and ask me to help them put their tights on.

I was never part of that group of mums who have bizarre classes lined up for little Henry and Jennifer every day of the week - they were talking about baby ballet, something with intruments (I don't think it was rock guitar or death metal) and other goodies. I found out that 'swimming' was £120 a term - so if the others are the same, then about £400 a term. Three terms a year. £1200. Fuck me.

Too much time and money - what happened to playing with your kids on your own, or with your friends and their kids? It's what I did, and what my mum did. And what all the - er - vaguely normal humans did.
Thank fek nobody said 'play dates', I might have shouted Fuck Off! very loudly from the changing rooms.

Give it ten years - Henry will be advertising his party on Facebook and hoards of the great unwashed will be shagging on the shagpile, pissing in the washing machine and vomiting Chardonnay down the back of Jennifer's tutu.

(Knitting - lots to report, stay tuned)

Step by step sewing. Part the first.

This is an absolute beginner's guide to sewing, with a sewing machine. Very step by step, very simple. Everybody needs to start somewhere, and once you are confident the world is your - er - sewing oyster. Sewing was my first love, I ruined my mums hoover with the amount of pins it had to pick up from the (cold) dining room where I used to have her old sewing machine set up. My nan sewed, my mum sewed - my aunty and my sister - and my daughter - zero interest!



OK, so you have a machine. It does NOT have to be a super flash thing that does everything except wear the damned clothes - my current one is cheap and cheerful and absolutely super. Price-wise - this cost me about £140 about 4 years ago, they are available cheaper and simple ones like this also sell second hand. Ask around, you might be surprised who has one sitting unwanted and unloved upstairs - borrow one or two, and see what you like. Is it quiet enough? Smooth enough? Easy to thread? Does it seem strong enough for your needs - this little machine wouldn't be too happy about sewing a lot of thick heavy denim for example. Find a decent sewing machine shop and don't be afraid to ask! Do not be led into the expensive side - machines can cost thousands.



This (above) is the side of my machine - the little switch is the on / off (I warned you this was going to be literally step by step! don't be offended!),the light on this one comes on automatically when I flick the switch, on some models there is a separate switch near the light- the black connector leads to the plug, and one wire leads to the foot pedal which is under the table. The wheel pulls in and out - more of that to come.

Don't worry about the round dials on the front just yet - let's have a look at this bottom part. This is the footplate (the silver metal plate) and the feed dog (thats the grooved, rippled silver metal where the needle will go in and out of). Lots of little bits to help you in the area, but again, we don't need it right this minute, We have more important things to do.

The front of this machine just unclips - most will have a similar section that does this, to allow you to thread the machine. Bit tricky to sew otherwise .... see the little white door under where the needle is? Open that ...

...and this is what's inside. This is where the spool lives - this is the part that catches onto the sewing machine needle and its thread, to form the loops of thread that hopefully will hold your work securely together! This is an important part of your machine - keep it clean (more later - and yes, my machine is dusty and needs cleaning).

With me so far? We have looked at the overall layout of your machine - the part that plugs in, the bits that whizz round and have opened secret compartments to find the bit that holds the spool. Now we are going to be extra brave, and tease open the spool case - that's the silver case that holds your little spool (the spool is hidden at the moment, try to contain your excitement).

More to come soon! Part two will show you how to successfully thread your machine, and look at a couple of other important parts on it. I don't know if anyone will ever read this, or find it useful - I hope so. I have some nice easy projects in mind, ones that should actually be useful and not too naff! Please come back very soon, thank you for reading!

Bugger

Had written a post with piccies and everything - and it vanished. The tinternet connection (physically speaking, not the ether itself) is falling apart, time to ring up and get it upgraded to wireless methinks.
Anyway. Will replace that one later. But now - a moan.

Knitcamp. I am going, but only booked two classes due to funding (they aint cheap) and other things, called Knitting Doesn't Rule My Life and I plan on having a holiday!
BUT
other reasons.

The thing itself (and it has descended into being a 'thing') is 'organised' by one woman, who shall remain nameless. Novel approach to customer service, that runs along the lines of, and I quote - 'I am the organiser and I make all the rules'. I kid you not.

There will be one knitting supplies shop on camp (it's based in a uni - I am NOT staying on site thank fek) - three guesses whose it is? Am I the only person who finds this fundamentally wrong? The whole event, which is costing people a lot of money, seems centred on self promotion and money making for her, as much of it as she can grab.

Then the issue of kids in classes came up, when somone asked if she could bring her breastfed baby with her into classes. I like kids, I teach kids, but god no, on my holidays I don't want to be anywhere near other people's bloody kids! I am the person who walks miles along the beach to find aq quiet deserted spot. And to me, those who think it's fine to bring them to this sort of a thing, are often the parents who have a rather free and easy approach - ie their kids are little shits and they ignore them.

So after a very weird lot of exchanges, where those who disagreed with babies in classes were made to feel like King Herod, the rule book began to change. From something along the lines of 'Oh no, it would be ridiculous to have kids in class! Would spoil the lessons and tutors wouldn't like it, and no way are we getting CRB checks!' to 'Yes, children can come, no problem!', with many twists and turns and backtracking along the way. And I am not exaggerating.

Pile of crap.
Apparently the cost of booking a stall for Ravelry weekend there is huge, and many of those interested have dropped out, due to it being too close to fibre festivals with LOTS more visitors (ie thousands more), the attitude of this woman, the general disorganisation etc etc. Me? I would like a stall, I think my bags would sell quite well as they are not expensive and are useful, but lordy, is it really worth it?

There, that's that out of the way. Now, time for an hours knitting .... happy weekend everyone.

the lost post ...

A fairly blurry photo of my slapdash approach to blocking - this is the bodice section (obviously) of the Lilith cardi - the body is finished as are both sleeves, lace and ribbon trims are bought, and since I took this, the bodice has been seamed. So today I aim to get it pretty much sewn together, and then sit and look at it for a week while I decide what to do about the front.

I fancied plain black tape down each side, with buttons on the right side and black poppers on the insides, but I am not convinced it will be strong enough. So it might be a case of picking up stitches and knitting a band, which I didn't really want. Hey ho.

And this - the first successful attempt at knitting in the round, on circular needles - for some reason I have had a lifelong mental block about this, but finally gave it a go.

My bed, With knobs on.

I have a new bed, and it is gorgeous! A bit of a sod to put together single handed, but it's done, and I love it - very comfy, very old fashioned, very nice. And it has knobs. (insert childish snort of giggles here)

And sewing has been happening, listed four new bags on etsy yesterday, more to take photos of, and more to make (I think there are about five cut out ready to interface).

Stuff aplenty to do today.
Is it bedtime yet?

Wish me well ...

... the bed madness begins. Am about to get dressed (still in jimjams and haven't dried my hair yet) and nip into town, need a new spanner! Have read through the comments on the new bed and it sounds fine, just lots to tighten (all the slats are separately fastened down).

Kerri is due sometime in the afternoon to help with the heavy work, so I had better get a move on, although I don't plan to be out for long. Get this lot out of the way, and then I can crack on with some knitting and sewing, the house is clean and tidyish so the rest of the day is my own.

Knitting - have almost finished Lilith, from an old The Knitter magazine, its a lovely pattern but I am pretty sick of it now and want it finished. Narvik (a Rowan pattern in Cocoon) is currently blocking on the floor, so will get seamed tonight all being well - that's my second cardi of the year.

Sewing - have several box bags to photograph and list on etsy, and then get some more cut out and interfaced tonight ready to sew tomorrow. Piccies to come (sun, would be nice to see a bit of you so I can get some good photos!).

Bye for now, enjoy your weekends whatever you are doing.

Where has it gone?

No other reason than I really really like this coat! LOVE THOSE BUTTONS! That's all.

(see below)

The last week, that is - another Saturday and STILL clearing upstairs! Ha! That's what happens when you have a teeny tiny house (or the cottage, as my mum now calls it) and many hobbies. Painting, woodwork, paper crafts, jewellery making, stitch markers, knitting, spinning, sewing - I also want to get a loom but that one will have to wait until I ever get a new job and move.

But finally, upstairs is looking as good as a teeny tiny bedroom and a ridiculously small 'spare' room (ie box room) can get. Am so looking forward to Monday night, so long as the new bed goes together OK ... tomorrow is for bringing the existing crappy bed down and stacking it in the teeny tiny garden (then I neeed to ring and book a couple of collections from the 'bulky waste' folks). Bulky waste ... doesn't bear thinking about does it?

The knitting - I like the headband (that's the purple cabled wotsit above) - I needed a break from the 4 cardies I am knitting (one is finished and needs seaming) (one is almost finished and I am DREADING seaming that one), and needed a cable fix - also trying to get some of the ridiculous mountain of wool upstairs knited up. This did the trick (only half a ball of wool though) - Wendy Mode, which is very cheap but feels soft and shows the cables pretty well, might make Kerri a cabled cowl from the rest. The pattern is free on Ravelry - http://www.ravelry.com/projects/sulkycat/bamboozled (don't know how to magic link that so it doesn't have the full text?). Took 3 hours infront of the telly last night, have finished it with a button and loop instead of ties and rather like it.

What else - am increasingly pissed off with a prat of a woman over on Ravelry, to the extent that I rarely post in my favourite group. Silly to let it get to me so much maybe, but she really is a fekwit of the utmost degree, and in reality? No, let's not go there ... A spoiled, greedy, cheap, lazy, selfish winging and moaning baby, pretty much everything I dislike in people, all rolled into one.
There. That's better out than in! Think hapy thoughts and breathe .....

Or eat chocolate until you feel sick. Either will do.

Chocolate. I would love chocolate right now, lots of it - a big fat bar of Galaxy would do fine. But Fat Club is on Monday and I am determined to shift some lard from this rounded body of mine - lost 3.5lbs last week which was great.

And I still haven't written a single word in my journal . diary. Twit.